Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Caedmon's Birth Story



Warning:  This post is extreeeeemely long.  I'm sorry!  I tried & I tried, but being that I am so emotionally attached to this story, I just could not trim it down much more.  (Trust me, there is an even longer version with like every. single. tiny. detail in it, but I am saving that for Cade's baby book - and sparing you, dear reader.)  

The Shortest Version I Could Muster... 
Little Cade just didn't want to come out, bless his heart.  So with our doctor's support, we went to 42 weeks gestation before we gave him the boot and went in for an induction.  Labor had surprisingly begun on its own just hours before going to the hospital, so we labored naturally for about 5.5 hours.  Then nurses started rushing in our room, rushed me out for an emergency c-section in very frightening and dramatic style, and got our sweet babe out of me in 7 minutes flat.  I was put under, Nick wasn't even in the room, and I woke up without my baby in my arms.  Cade had a bowel movement in utero, and sadly had ingested some into his lungs.  He was in the NICU for only 3 days, thank goodness, and he did not have an infection THANK YOU LORD.  

The Longer, More Detailed Version.... 

Our sweet little baby boy came to us not at all as we expected or planned, but we trust in a Sovereign God who knows what is best for us, and that is how we find comfort in the story of his birth.  Nick and I took some pretty intensive birth classes that met for seven weeks, and each meeting was 2.5 hours long.  We covered a lot of ground in those classes!  It was our hope to be able to let labor begin on its own, and labor naturally as much as possible.  We were armed with coping techniques, comfort measures, affirmation cards, encouraging worship music on our phones, gourmet popsicles all the way from Alabama (shout-out to Steel City Pops & my parents for packing them on dry ice to bring them to me! Ha!), the support of our doctor, and the support and love of our family and friends.  
Throughout the pregnancy, we had been praying for Caedmon to stay in for the “full 40” (weeks), and that he did.  He did that so well, he even threw in a couple of extra bonus weeks  to show mom and dad how good he could be at staying put!  ;-)  Our doctor supported us in going to 42 weeks, and for the last two weeks, was diligent to conduct testing to make sure the baby was okay and my fluid levels were still good.  We went ahead and scheduled an induction for 42 weeks in the event that labor did not begin on its own.  The Friday before that, I had one final appointment for more monitoring.  My doctor (Dr. Evans) wasn’t in that day, so I met with Dr. Justice.  At that point, I was dilated just past 4 cm, but we were still waiting for contractions to start.  She instructed me to come in the following Tuesday at 7am for our induction.  However, I knew Dr. Evans had previously told me I would come in at midnight on Monday night, so I mentioned that to Dr. Justice.  She said she would check with Dr. Evans and someone would get back in touch with me.  Later that day, someone from the office did call me, and told me to go ahead and plan to go to the hospital Monday night at midnight, as Dr. Evans had originally said.  So that’s what we planned for.  
Over that weekend, I really did try just about everything to help induce labor naturally.  I did the Miles Circuit, even walking up and down our street with one foot on the curb and one foot on the street (that had to have been hilarious to witness).  We ate spicy food.  And, I took Evening Primrose Oil.  My parents drove up Sunday night after church and we were SO excited to see them and have them here.  My mom and I spent that Monday relaxing, & getting a few things ready, while my Dad actually went to work with Nick.  His helper was sick so Nick needed an extra hand putting in a backsplash, so my Dad was a good sport and got to learn how to put in some tile!  We all went to a very late lunch together, then went home to rest some before our big night.  
Nick had gone downstairs to take a nap, and he said he was really praying for labor to begin on its own while he was down there.  I had pretty much given up on that hope, and was frustrated that my body didn’t seem to be working “normally” like so many other women’s.  I felt like the odds were stacked against us if we had to induce with Pitocin, and that we likely wouldn’t be able to have the natural birth we were hoping for.  I went downstairs to join Nick in resting for a little bit, and as we were laying in bed, at around 8:45, I started noticing a repeated tightening of my stomach (uterine) muscles.  I had no clue how to know what contractions felt like since everyone always says “oh you’ll know” (which is not helpful at all).  These weren’t really very painful, but they were reoccurring, so I told Nick I thought I may be having contractions.  We both got excited and began timing them using all these fancy apps they have for phones now.  Surely enough, they were averaging about 5 minutes apart, and continued that way for about an hour as we rested downstairs.  We got some advice from friends, prayed, then went upstairs to tell my parents.  We were all so excited that it was finally happening – right before we had to induce with Pitocin!  We had planned to get some kind of a late dinner before going into the hospital since I knew I wouldn’t be allowed to eat after I checked in.  At that point, it was about 10:00pm so there weren’t a ton of great options available to us.  We decided that O’Charley’s might have the best selection of some pastas and proteins so we could “carb load.”  That ended up being a poor choice, but our memories are sweet of us sitting around the table of a mostly empty restaurant, excited about meeting our son, and working through contractions out in public.  
We made one final stop by Meijer (grocery store) to pick up a couple of other things (and walk around more to keep labor progressing), and then we proceeded to the hospital.  We got there right at midnight, and although we gave my parents the option to go home and rest, they decided to stay with us there at the hospital for the time being.  We waited forever it seemed, before someone finally came and got all of our information entered in.  Then our nurse came and got us started with everything.  I had requested a heparin lock since I didn’t want an IV or epidural.  This was in case an emergency arose and I needed fluids quickly.  Getting the hep lock was probably the most painful thing about my entire experience!  I’m not really afraid of needles, but they had to stick me 5 times before they could get it in!  Each nurse, one by one, would come in, very nicely try to put the hep lock in, fail, and then say “I don’t want to torture you any more” so they would leave and go get another nurse who would come in and say (and do) the exact same thing.  Nick thinks they were drawing straws at the nurse’s station! ;-)  Finally, one lady came and got it done, but she wasn’t very gentle, and at that point I was in tears.  After about the fourth time I was stuck, I asked if there was any other option for me – and I was ready to abandon my own plan of getting the hep lock.  But thankfully (as it ended up being VERY necessary), they told me no, and they were finally able to get it in.  Thank You, Lord.
Armed with the hep lock, and wireless monitors, Nick and I began to walk the hallways, bounce on the birth ball, eat popsicles, and do all those fun laboring things together.  I read through some of my affirmation cards and tried to focus my mind on the task at hand.  The contractions remained about 4-5 minutes apart, and I was dilated about 4.5 cm.  We listened to Rich Mullins, Hillsong, The Wailin’ Jenny’s and some other encouraging worship songs to keep us focused and refreshed.  It really was a very sacred time together.  Once, while walking the hallways, I had Nick go get my parents from the waiting room and they came and walked with us around the halls.  It was like our own little laboring parade.  ;-)
Around 5am, I decided to go back to the room and rest some in between contractions.  I had dilated to 5.5 cm, so we were pleased with our progress but wanted to make sure we continued to progress so they didn’t put us on Pitocin.  At about 5:30, after one of my contractions, Nick told me that the contractions had actually been getting a little further apart.  They had gone from being about 4 minutes apart, to being 7 or 9 minutes apart.  I told him that was probably normal and that at 6am we would get up and move around some more to help things progress.  Well, we never made it to 6am.  Around 5:40am, a couple of nurses rushed in our room and told me to flip over onto my left side.  I asked if I could go to the bathroom and they said not yet.  So I flipped over onto my left side.  Then they instructed me to flip over onto my right side as fast as I could.  I asked again if I could go to the bathroom, and our nurse very forcefully said NO.  I knew when she said this, that something was wrong.  They then told me to get on all fours – on the bed.  So I did.  They told me to stick my bottom up in the air, so I did.  All this time, more people were rushing into the room, yet we had no clue what was actually happening.  I heard someone say “prep for c-section” and I began to panic.  Then immediately  began trying to calm myself down, reminding myself to trust in God and that He was in control of this.  I don’t think I saw Nick after that point, until it was all overwith, but I remember trying to holler for him to make sure he had his phone so he could take pictures once the baby was here.  I also tried to yell for him to call his mom, since she wasn’t at the hospital yet.  I either didn’t have a voice, or was already too far out of the room as they were rolling me away to the OR – but of course, Nick had the common sense to both have his phone AND call his mom without me telling him!  ;-)  Some blessed soul of a nurse who was at the head of my bed began to talk me through some of what was happening before they took me out of our room.  She said I needed to remain on my hands and knees as they whisked me away to the OR, and that she was going to cover me up – God bless her soul.  (I still had no clue why they were rushing me to a c-section or what was going on medically, however.)  
The trip to the OR was a short one.  I don’t remember a ton of it.  I remember people running.  I remember thinking – “we talked about this in our birth classes.  This is an emergency c-section – my worst case scenario in a birth plan.”  I knew that since this was an emergency, Nick likely would not be in the OR with me.  I knew that since I did not have an epidural, I would likely be completely put under, and I knew that there was a good chance I would wake up without my baby.  (That last one was definitely my worst fear - in a scenario where mom and baby are safe and healthy, of course.)  Throughout my pregnancy, I had often thought how sad that must be to wake up in a recovery room without the sweet little one you carried and nourished for 9 long months.  When I got into the OR, the anesthesiologist began to talk to me.  He was a nice little Asian man who spoke calmly and was really the only one who seemed to be talking to me, or asking if I had any questions.  They told me to crawl onto the operating table, and I remember losing my earing and telling them that.  Bright lights shoved overhead and all around.  People everywhere, and everyone was frantic.  Some kind of water/sterilizing agent was literally thrown on my midsection.  My arms were stretched out to either side of me and I remember feeling very exposed and manhandled.  It was crazy and I didn’t even have time to process anything really.  I asked the nice anesthesiologist two questions:  1) When would I get to see my baby? And 2) Would I feel anything?  He told me that it would just depend on the health of my baby as to when I would get to see him (this is true – he had to answer that way ), and I’m guessing he told me no that I wouldn’t feel anything, but I really don’t remember anything past that.  But I knew I was about to be cut open and I definitely didn’t want to feel that!!
I was rushed to the OR at 5:45am, and our sweet little Caedmon was born at 5:52am.  They had him out of me literally in 7 minutes.  The doctors said when they cut me open and broke my water, it was filled with meconium – the early stool passed by a baby.  Our poor little guy had had a bowel movement in utero and unfortunately, he had ingested some of it.  This was why his heart rate dropped to 50, and then was undetectable, which sent the nurses rushing in my room just a few short minutes before they had him out of me.  They said when they pulled him out of me, he was in shock and very “depressed,” even discolored.  For this, I am thankful I was put under, because I know that seeing him like that would have terrified me and I would never ever be able to forget seeing him like that.  Just the thought of him in such a state makes me extremely sad and emotional.  His Apgar score at 1 minute after birth was a 5 – pretty low.  The doctors said they had to suction him out 4 times before he cried.  Nick said he heard him cry while he stood outside the door of the OR and at that moment, he knew Caedmon was going to be fine.  It was a healthy – loud cry, he said!  (As I had guessed, Nick was not able to be in the OR with me because it was such a rushed/emergency C-section; he didn’t have time to scrub up.)  They did a number of things to our little babe in the OR before he was taken to the NICU.  One of them was a scope, to remove any meconium he had ingested.  The report said that they pulled out “chunks of meconium” during this procedure.  ☹  His Apgar score at 5 minutes after birth was 8 – a much better number, thankfully!  
At 6:11am, Dr. Justice came out of the OR holding Caedmon, and Nick got to meet his son for the first time.  I am still so very sad that I missed getting to see this once in a lifetime moment!!  I am so thankful the doctors and nurses offered to take pictures for us though, so I could see a part of it.  Nick said Cade was screaming and crying when she brought him out to him, but as soon as the doctor handed him to him, Cade immediately calmed down.  (!!)  They really do know their mommies and daddies. ☺  The doctors briefed Nick on what had happened, and then they took Cade off to the NICU in an isolette  so he could be monitored and treated for meconium aspiration.   

At about 7:30am I woke up in recovery, with Nick at my side.  He filled me in on what had happened, and of course I was very upset to be without our baby.  However, he had gotten to hold him right after he was born and the doctor took pictures for us, so Nick showed me those on his phone.  I was very groggy and Nick says I asked the same questions over and over again.  The two doctors who were in the delivery room (Dr. Justice & Dr. Buck) came and talked to us, but I really don’t remember much of what they said.  I don’t know how long I was in recovery, but I do remember finally being wheeled up to my room in the Postpartum unit, where I was greeted by some of our family members.  It was so good to finally see everyone and feel their love and support after such a stressful situation.   
I was able to go see Cade in the NICU that day (Tuesday) at noon, and then later that afternoon, at 4pm, I was able to finally hold him.  I will never forget the feeling of rounding the corner in the NICU and seeing my son for the first time.  I was absolutely overwhelmed with emotions – and tired and groggy from just having had surgery that morning.  It was a blur, but it was so sweet.  Just before I got to hold him later that day, the nurse had pricked his little heel & he was screaming & crying, bless his heart.  (And at that point, I was crying with him of course.)  When they handed him to me, I will never forget.  His dark little eyes locked in on mine, and he immediately quit crying.  He knew who was holding him, and he was finally back in a familiar and comfy place to him.  (All the tears.) 

Cade ended up staying in the NICU only until that Friday.  Thankfully, he did not have any kind of infection from ingesting the meconium (THANK YOU LORD).  Our doctor told us later how very lucky he really was, and said that another patient of hers  who had gone into labor at 39 weeks gestation, had meconium aspiration as well, and their baby was in the NICU for a solid week.  All of the NICU nurses and staff were SO very helpful and kind.  Thankfully, I was able to nurse him, so Nick and I would spend most of our days in the NICU with him, and then we would wake up several times through the night and make the long trek down the hallways and up to the 4th floor in order to feed him.  Those trips were long & tiring, but I was always excited to get to see my baby, and so thankful to have the opportunity to feed him myself.  I would feed him as best as I could, then pump, then wash all of the bottles and pump parts, wrap our little man back up and kiss him goodnight, then Nick would usually see how fast he could push me in my wheelchair back to our room on the third floor – so we could get as much sleep in as possible before the next feeding.  Those trips were tiring, but incredibly precious to me.  While feeding him, we would listen to worship music on our phones and sing to him, & pray over him.  I absolutely cherish those sweet times together as our new little family of three.   
Cade was discharged from the NICU Friday morning and then he came & spent that day and night with us in our room.  Then I was discharged on Saturday, and we all got to go home together as a family that afternoon.  (Such a blessing.)  Just before the discharge nurse came by, Dr. Justice came by, who was making rounds that day.  She had been on call when Cade was born, and was the doctor who technically delivered him.  Pretty much everything any doctors or nurses told us while we were in the hospital seemed like a big blur, and it was extremely hard to comprehend information.  So I got the chance to talk a little with Dr. Justice to understand more about some things that had happened.  I also got the chance to thank her for what she did, and for keeping us both safe and healthy.  While talking with her, I tearfully asked her what would have happened if we hadn’t been in the hospital when Cade’s heart rate dropped.  She said “well, that really hit home with me, because I had told you to come in at 7am that morning… and that’s why I always believe there is divine intervention.”  Yes.  100% we believe this too.  Our gracious Lord was in it all – as we prayed through the pregnancy, worshipped through labor, praised in the NICU, and rejoice now that we are all home together.  
“’Do I bring to the moment of birth & not give delivery?’ says the LORD. ‘Do I close up the womb when I bring to delivery?’ says your God.”
~Isaiah 66:9





1 comment:

  1. I read both versions Ruth. After reading the short one I had to get all the details. I am sitting here with tears on my face. My little boy will be 40 years old on 8/23 and I know the emotions you and Nick experienced. God is so good. Bless you all.
    Sybil

    ReplyDelete